6 letters I have in mind about LIFE, G.O.O.G.L.E

Go On Over Girls Lool Existence

DO I MAKE YOU PROUD? final words for all-star pbbfg

Oh well… I thought we’ll not be asked for any FINAL WORDS for the Game… So there, we’re asked… *sighs*

Like what I’ve said on the last confession that I posted here entitled “all-star” I say that – WORDS ARE NOT enough to say how THANKFUL and GRATEFUL I am to be a part of the PBBFG not just once but TWICE… First that I would like to give my thanks with is JEN ALOJADO for she’s the one who registered me for the ALL-STAR… I wouldn’t be there if it wasn’t for her… Secondly, I would like to thank BBK for the undying PATIENCE he gave me and the rest of the All-Star Virtual Housemates on the entire period of the game… BBK was the one who influenced each and everyone to know the value of unending PATIENCE, DISCIPLINE, CONCERN and AFFECTION towards the game and most especially along with the other Virtual Housemates that we’ll be spending time with inside the Virtual House for 100 days… Again, I’ll say that 100 DAYS isn’t enough to know a person deeply, but in this game, I’ve proved that 100 or less than a hundred days of stay inside the Virtual House has been enough for me TO KNOW “WHO” the REAL and REEL persons are INSIDE and OUT…

All-Star Pinoy Big Brother Fantasy Game will be noted as: WORTH REMEMBERING… For in this game, I was able to PROVE WHO and WHAT I REALLY AM… For some, they see me as the VILLAIN of the GAME – for others, I am a FRIEND and an INSPIRATION which inspired, influenced, moved and guided me to stay long enough and even named as the BIG WINNER of the GAME… Being a Virtual Housemate wasn’t easy for me – never been… But as long as you have “REAL FRIENDS” who’ll continue to inspire you, NOTHING is IMPOSSIBLE and a lot of THINGS do awaits you not just VIRTUALLY but, REAL LIFE so to speak…

All-Star has a lot KEEPSAKES that I can consider and will forever hold on along across the walk of life. Life inside the Virtual House is eminent beyond comparison – for in this Online or Fantasy Game, I’ve met different types of people and has been friends with them along the way… I can’t say that I’ve been friends with everybody… But, I’ve dealt with all of them… The essence of INDIVIDUALITY was my main concern… For as individuals, I’ve learned that, it is not everyday of your entire being in a certain situation (whether virtually or real life) that you’ll get to see yourself on your toughest or weakest… I am saying these stuffs, because “I’ve been there, done that”…. 

I am (again) quoting this… I am not just saying this now, rather I’ve said these before…

For those WHO’VE BEEN GOOD TO ME all THROUGHOUT… a BIG THANKS!!!  For those who broke my heart and TRIED TO UNNERVE ME, THANKS anyway.. You’ve all made ME STRONGER and WHERE I AM NOW… To those who doesn’t like me even after the game, DO I MAKE THEM PROUD?  I know everything happens for a reason and WHATEVER THAT IS, I leave it up to HIM… To those who HATED ME or MAYBE IN A WAY CURSED ME, THANKS tooYOU ALL MADE ME REALIZE That I AM GOOD BEYOND MY IMPERFECTIONS… To those whom I GOT OFFENDED IN A WAY, I’M SORRY… I hope you understand… THIS IS ME… LOVE ME, HATE ME… I’M JUST BEING ME… Loves you all!

Through EXPERIENCE I am saying all of these… For I can prove that “we can’t please everyone or every person that we’ll meet along the way”… During my stay, even if I’ve been a Virtual Housemate before – I still felt rattled and shaky… For I’ve met and became friends with some and some totally hated me!!!

First, I’ve never been aware of WHO really BENJ is and what he became during his Season… Some may find him “the VILLAIN” – but now I am saying through “experience” (again) that beneath his villain personality lies a GOOD HEART too. He may have projected a BAD VH image but once we get to know and dug deep, we’ll see HOW GOOD HE REALLY is… He was one of my INSPIRATION for to me and Gee he never lied… He’s been TRUE to his words since the first time we chatted… To BENJ, thanks for believing in ME… The game may have been more colorful and worth remebering if you stayed longer…

For ANN who I see as “one of” the intelluctual VH has been good too… I don’t measure one’s being because I’ve learned that he/she voted me out and wants me OUT of the circulation… She may have voted for me as 2nd Runner Up for the Big 3 – but that doesn’t mean I don’t like the ANN in her… Whatever it is that has been her basis for doing “it” – it doesn’t really matter to me… I guess that really is how “someone” saw and felt for me… Ann has been a rational person and I am vividly aware of that… To Ann, thanks for everything, I really am a bit intimidated by you but I’m thankful for I’ve been acquainted with someone like you, at least before the game ended…

For JOMAR, who I’ve been friends with since Season 2 because of PISAY stuffs… I say that “THOSE WERE THE DAYS” – I am actually honored to meet a KID like him… A kid who’s so IMPULSIVE and “always” been one of those few WHO HATED and see me as THE VILLAIN… I can’t change that part actually… That’s how he see me… That’s totally what HE FELT ABOUT ME and I don’t care what negative words from this kid  awaits me… For the road, I just say that “I’m proud of him” and “I’ve always believed in him…” And, I say, “Stay positive… Being OPTIMISTIC in a certain situation isn’t wrong” – now, GOODLUCK Jomar! Against me or anybody else, GOODLUCK…

To TRISH… The CONSTANT one… 😉 a FRIEND… A follower… I can’t blame her if she doesn’t like me… I’ll take this time to write everything that I see in her since Day 001… I know of Trish as the SWEET virtual housemate, that was Day 001… But as she became an evictee, she hated me since… For whatever reasons she has for that, I RESPECT it… Totally and certainly respects it… That’s how you see me… If I’ve done or have said something wrong, I know that was UNINTENTIONAL… I can’t blame her if she constantly misunderstood my being… That’s what I mean by INDIVIDUAL DIFFERENCES and I can’t change the norms… If she misunderstood the answers that I’ve given for her questions as a jury, I AM DEEPLY SORRY FOR THAT… That’s not what I meant from the answers that I have stated… If she thinks that I might have said something wrong or beyond my limitations, that how she interpreted it… But that wasn’t my intention after all… I know from her words “papampam” or pa-ano man yun… She’s mainly stressing it against me or Gee… If that’s what she thought of me, then SO BE IT… I won’t be pushing myself or insisting myself just for that someone to like me… I did not join the game so as TO PLEASE anyone or everyone, but to PROVE MY LOVE for OTHERS whom I called FRIENDS and to KNOW the REST of the Virtual Housemate inside and out and so as TO PROVE my LOVE for the GAME… To TRISH, thanks for EVERYTHING… from all the “text messages” I received… I would say and am PROUD TO SAY – that she MADE ME STRONGER @ THIS POINT OF MY LIFE… I have to admit, marami ang nagsabi na wag kong iyakan ang bagay na yun, but being called to as someone you’re NOT, masakit talaga… But one thing’s SET IN MY MIND… To FIGHT MORE UNTIL THE END…

To IAN… I just want him to FIGHT MORE for the game… I’ve seen and known him for long… And I know that beyond this PBBFG also lies a GOOD and PURE IAN… I just found things funny when I chatted with an exVH from Season 2 (Adrian) who personally knows IAN… I just wish that I’d be given a chance to meet Ian in person, LIVE and in FLESH too… 😉

To Kenneth, everything about him and stuffs we’ve shared with each other – I TREASURE… I remember our “last chat” – my first impression for him was really GENUINE… Coz in this game, if there’s one VH that I’d say or call to as “REALITY as we wanted it to be” it’s Kenneth… If only he didn’t come and visit the Philippines, I know he’ll prove himself more… Kenneth, too good to be true… Such a kid with kind heart… I felt so rewarded for knowing him and whatever that is – it’s the FRIENDSHIP we’ve shared for a “not-so-long-term” – but I know, friendship isn’t measured on how long or how short we known each other well…

To MARGE who’s been there for me alwaysI’ll never forget how much she treasured our being sisters… ATCHIE will always be one-word I’ll hang on with… For that proved me that our FRIENDSHIP is BEYOND everything… We’re not just FRIENDS, but we’re SISTERS… We’re FAMILY…

To KASHEN… One person I never thought I’d be close with… I value everything about her… She taught me a lot about things… She taught me how to BE STRONG… She may just be as playful as a kid who loves to watch anime stuffs and wrestling but inside her lies a person who’s not just beautiful on the outside – but in the inside as well… Kashen, you’ll be in my heart always… I know right from the start that even if All-Star ended that doesn’t mean our FRIENDSHIP has bid it’s goodbye… IT DOESN’T… Thanks for being with me all the time… YOU and MARGE are a real sisters…

To NEIL… You’ve touched my life for a moment (line from a song yan!) – I was sound asleep the 29th of January, around 04:39 in the afternoon… I woke up around 18:30 pm… Checked my cellphone first before I got up… Received 2 messages from him saying, “Oist! congrats, mats! Kaw pala ang big winnr! Wow! So happy 4 u.” 2 messages I received containing the same texts… Also had one missed call – was too surprised to see who it was, coz it was from him… Sabi nga niya “nasa loob daw ang kulo” ko… I don’t see it as an insult, rather, a COMPLIMENT… For in him, when you talk or chat with him, he merely doesn’t want to talk about the GAME, rather all about LIFE, real-life stuffs… And I’m proud of having him as a FRIEND… I’ll forver CARRY ON, on whatever friendship we had… Tacos, Burritos, Quarter Pounder, whatever… Neil, the heart-flatttering, mouth-watering – heart-watering, mouth-flattering, I’M GLAD to have KNOWN someone LIKE HIM…

To CHARLES, having Charles as a FRIEND is more that enough of what I’ve been looking for a FRIEND… He’s somone that you can always be yourself with, no if’s no but’s… Whatever it is that you’ll be hearing from him will forever be an inspiration… He’s someone that you can tell everything won’t hesitate to open up… A GOOD FRIEND, A TEACHER in the MAKING and one person that I’ll consider TREE of FRIENDSHIP… He’s the TREE OF LIFE and of our friendship… Coz like a TREE our presence was immediately felt in the Virtual House as that which fuels laughter and bonding… Charles has always appreciated me despite our different forte. Indeed, no one can stop us from trekking our various paths and living up to our common ideals.

To PAOLO… my FRIEND… my CONFIDANTE… my BROTHER… He’s someone of the WHOLE PACKAGE… We’ve been through a lot during ALL-STAR, but we never took it personally… We never let those things ruin our friendship… He was the one taught me not to take things seriously… He’s make me laugh if he felt that I’m sad… One thing I won’t forget about him was when he texted me last year of November… It was the 24th around 19:05 saying, “ate mats kng mkkpagonline k ngaun emergency lang c paolo 2. cp 2 ni mama my kelangan lng ako sbhin sau bago ko 2 gawin. pasencya sa abala.” And me, the “UTU-UTO” one got on at YM and buzzed him… If he only knew how my heart was pounding that time… *shrugs* Sus si PAOLO… He just wanted to hear from me lang pala… Emergency pa siyang nalalaman… I won’t froget his FINAL STATEMENT, Season 2… He stated, I BELIEVE I CAN FLY by Katharine McPhee… Now, to Paolo… DO I MAKE YOU PROUD by Taylor Hicks will be my answer to his final words during our season… Paolo’s the jolly type… As if he doesn’t care a bit at all… He won’t let you feel how important you are to him, but in the end, HE’LL LET YOU FEEL HOW MUCH HE TREASURES YOU… He’s been the CRAZY one… I’m the CRANK (crazy + drunk) *lol* but still he managed to ignite the word FRIENDSHIP… Paolo will forever be my TORCHwere warmth, love and wisdom emanates in him. Each little spark in him fuels the bigger torch which not lights only our path but others as well. Like its unending flame, he has touched countless hearts and souls with his enduring and enormous capacity to love.

To MICA, the one that keeps on STANDING STILL… An inspiration… Thanks for everything… She showed me what “friendship really is” She somewhat managed to be herself up to the last day of the GAME… We may have had misunderstandings before… But she didn’t put whatever it is to test… I value how flexible she was the entire game… Sabi nga ni Mica “lagi nila ako vinovote out pero hindi sila nagtagumpay” – Very true… It was she herself who stood up from the rest! She kept on fighting and that I value the most… She can be the winner… But even without the title of being the BIG WINNER – I know that “GEE, MICA and ME are all A BIG WINNER coz we PROVED OURSELVES to EACH and EVERYONE…”

To GEE… We’ve had our UPS and DOWNS… Just like me and Pao… Some people may have put our FRIENDSHIP to test a lot of times, but we didn’t LET THOSE STUFFS block off in our friendship… We’ve stood up and managed to be WHO WE REALLY ARE UNTIL THE END… Some people may have kept on bad-mouthing “US” behind our backs… Some may see us PAPAMPAMS… Oh well, still, in the END… We kept on living! We kept on fighting! We surpassed all circumstances along the way… We both have been throught a lot of tests inside the Virtual House, but we didn’t let ourselves get manipulated by how the game wants us to be… We REMAINED WHO WE REALLY ARE… Gee, the exciting one and Mats, the cool one… We’re BOTH LOOL… And by those TESTS we’ve both surpassed – ONE THING has been evident… We value  TRUE FRIENDSHIP… We became TRUE FRIENDS… We’re not like THE RAIN that just pours on and then goes… WE’RE BOTH LIKE THE AIR… Sometimes keeping quiet but always there for each other… Constantly HANGING AROUND… Gee’s the BOUQUET of FRIENDSHIP… From all the buds that in time blossom to be a beautiful flower, became paradox of personalities, renaging from the meek to the Lion-hearted. Like a bouquet of flowers, Gee never fail to surprise everyone with what she has to offer. That characteristic aura she’ll left behind will never wilt and fade with the passing time… She’s a heaven’s gift not just virtually – but real life as well…

To BBK, the PEDESTAL that all All-Star Virtual Housemates hang on to… The BASE and the FOUNDATION of the VIRTUAL HOUSE, you were always there, may be INVISIBLE at all times but one thing’s SUREHE’S JUST AROUND, CONSTANTLY WATCHING… 

Finally, I say I will be the EAGLE  for I’ve always believed that GOD will crown our efforts with success. The cream of the crop, out of the bunch of unique and special individuals endowed with the depth of perception of a penchant and mellowed with love… I was like the eagle’s wings, for I  have flown to greater heights where I will reach the destiny, yet, will still dream as one.

I’ve never been
The one to raise my hand
That was not me
And now that’s who I am
Because of you
I am standing tall
My heart is full
Of endless gratitude
You were the one
The one to guide me through
Now I can see
And I believe
It’s only just beginning

This is what we dream about
But the only question with me now
Is do I make you proud
Stronger than I’ve ever been now
Never been afraid of standing out
Do I make you proud

I guess I’ve learned
To question is to grow,
That you still have faith,
Is all I need to know,
I’ve learned to love,
My selfish part of me,
And I’ve learned to
Walk on the road I believe.

Everybody needs to rise up
Everybody needs to be loved
To be loved
Everybody need to rise on
Everybody needs to be loved, to be loved

This is what we dream about
But the only question with me now
Is do I make you, do I make you proud
This is what we dream about
Never been afraid of standing out
Do I make you proud
Stronger than I’ve ever been
Never been afraid of standing out
Do I make you proud
Do I make you proud

😉 PBBFG All-Star, a WALK TO REMEMBER… Maristel Ocampo now signing off… But constantly around… You can all avail of me 24/7… One of the MEANEST and DIRTY (I may say) Season of PBBFG – but the GREATEST… The BEST EVER!!! 😉


1 Comment»

  KasHEn wrote @

thnx din sis sa lahat! mwahz! im olweys ir for yah! mwahz! tca!

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